St.Augusitine writing Confessions
While remembering all his youthful follies, he remembers how God's unfarthomable grace has been a shield for him, how grace leads to discover his faith into Three in One God.
Divine Illumination
St: Augustine receive divine illumination from Jesus the Son of God and Mary, the mother of Jesus, enlightening him while he is writing his discourse.
St.MONICA and St.AUGUSTINE at Ecstacy at Ostia
Two saints, mother and son receive a vision of heaven at Ostia, near Rome. It was the last moment of the two being together, looking heaven ward, and later St.Monica died and was buried there.
Seminarians on the wall.
With co-seminarians, where trying to escape the scourging sunlight, sitting on the fence and keeping ourselves calm with jokes.
Rosary Garden at Tabor Hill, Talamban
A place of prayer and peace, a place of love and charity where being together with the mother of our Divine Lord, and recitation of Holy Rosary knocks the doors of Heaven.
02 February, 2011
The Presentation of the Lord
01 February, 2011
HOLY VIRGIN MARY
31 January, 2011
AVE MARIA
27 January, 2011
Bible Jokes
AAAAA 2 Kings 21:13 "...and I will wipe Jerusalem as a man wipeth a dish, wiping it, and turning it upside down to dry."
What was Noah's greatest worry?
AAAAA The pair of mosquitoes.
What's the greatest case of constipation in the Bible?
AAAAA Satan the devil. Revelation says he will be bound up for a thousand years! (Rev 20:2 KJV)
Where is the first example of cannibalism in the Bible?
AAAAA Two Kings Ate One!
Who is the shortest person in the Bible?
AAAAA Bildad the Shuhite! . . . or . . . AAAAAA Knee High Miah! . . .or . . . AAAAAAA Peter (when he slept on his watch) . . . or . . AAAAAAAA Jesus (when He spoke on a mustard seed)
Who is the largest woman in the Bible?
AAAAA The woman of Some area (Samaria Jn 4)
How do we know Moses wore a wig?
AAAAA Sometimes he was with Aaron and sometimes he wasn't!
When is the first food fight mentioned in the Bible?
AAAAA "I looked and behold a flying roll!" (Zech 5:1 KJV)
Do you know the phone number for the Garden of Eden?
AAAAA Adam 8-1-2!
Who was the first drug addict in the Bible?
AAAAANebuchadnezzar. He was on grass for seven years.
What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
AAAAA1). Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a FURY.
AAAAAA2). David's TRIUMPH was heard throughout the land.
AAAAAAA3). HONDA...because the apostles were all in one Accord.
AAAAAAAA4). 2 Corinthians 4 v 8 describes going out in service maybe in a Volkswagen Beetle: "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed."
Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
AAAAASamson. He brought the house down.
Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?
AAAAAIn the big inning, Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel, and the Prodigal Son came home. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.
How did Adam and Eve feel when expelled from the Garden of Eden?
AAAAAThey were really put out.
Why couldn't Noah's wife and sons play cards on the Ark?
AAAAA Because Noah sat on the deck.
What is one of the first things that Adam and Eve did after they were kicked out?
AAAAAThey really raised Cain.
What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?
AAAAAYour mother ate us out of house and home.
The ark was built in 3 stories, and the top story had a window to let light in, but how did they get light to the bottom 2 stories?
AAAAAThey used floodlights.
Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?
AAAAADavid. He rocked Goliath to sleep.
Why was Goliath so surprised when David hit him with a slingshot?
AAAAAThe thought had never entered his head before.
What do they call pastors in Germany?
AAAAAGerman Shepherds.
What is the best way to get to Paradise?
AAAAATurn right and go straight.
Which servant of Jehovah was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
AAAAAMoses. Because he broke all 10 commandments at once.
Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
AAAAAThe area around the Jordan. The banks were always overflowing.
How do we know that Job went to a chiropractor?
AAAAABecause in Job 16:12 we read, "I had come to be at ease, but he proceeded to shake me up and he grabbed me by the back of the neck and proceeded to smash me."
Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible?
AAAAAWhen Joseph served in Pharaoh's court.
Where was the first cricket match mentioned in the Bible?
AAAAAAt Pentecost when Peter stood up with the eleven and was bowled. (bold)!!.
Did you know that Paul was the 1st surfer in the Bible?
AAAAARemember in Acts when he "came ashore on a board"!.
How do we know that the disciples were very cruel to the corn?
AAAAA Because they pulled it's ears.
Which Bible character had no parents?
AAAAA(1) Joshua, son of Nun
AAAAAA(2) Jonah, because he was brought up by a whale.
How do they make holy water?
AAAAA They boil the hell out of it!
26 January, 2011
Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
AAAAANoah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.
Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
AAAAAPharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out little prophet.
What kind of man was Boaz before he got married?
AAAAARuth-less.
Who was the first drug addict in the Bible?
AAAAANebuchadnezzar. He was on grass for seven years.
What did Eve ask Adam during their first argument?
AAAAA"Adam, is there another woman?"
At what time of day was Adam created?
AAAAAA little before Eve.
Did Eve never have a date with Adam?
AAAAANo, it was an apple.
Where is the first math problem mentioned in the Bible?
AAAAAIn Genesis, when God told Adam and Eve to go forth and multiply.
JOKES about NOAH
Why on Noah's ark couldn't they eat apples?
AAAAABecause they only came in pears
On the Ark, Noah probably got milk from the cows on-board. What did he get from the ducks?
AAAAAQuackers
Which animal on Noah's Ark had the highest level of intelligence?
AAAAAThe Giraffe
When was the first meat mentioned in the Bible?
AAAAA When Noah took Ham into the ark.
Why did Noah have to punish and discipline the chickens on the Ark?
AAAAA Because they were using "fowl" language.
How many people went on board the Ark before Noah?
AAAAA Three, because it says "... and Noah went forth"
JOKES LOT'S WIFE
Lot's last words to his wife?
AAAAA...Honey, is someone following
OR
Why was a woman in the Bible turned into a pillar of salt?
AAAAABecause she was dissatisfied with her Lot.
GENERAL BIBLE JOKES
Why should we all be encouraged by the story of Jonah and the whale?
AAAAA Because, Jonah was down in the mouth, but came out all right.
Why was everyone in Biblical times so poor?
AAAAA Because there was only one Job!..
How long did Cain dislike his brother?
AAAAA As long as he was Abel.
25 January, 2011
I COULD NOT RECOGNIZE YOU!
A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to
the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience.
Seeing God she asked 'Is my time up?'
God said, 'No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and
8 days to live.'
Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and
have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.
She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth!
Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.
After her last operation, she was released from the hospital.
While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.
Arriving in front of God, she demanded, 'I thought you
said I had another 43 years? Why didn't you pull me from
out of the path of the ambulance?'
God replied:
'I didn't recognize you.'
Many times in many ways we always want to be like someone other than who we are. In reality God wants us to be who we are. He wants us to imitate his son Jesus Christ or the Saints and Mother Mary. We try to follow anything new, everything fashionable, everyone except the above persons. First let us ask the grace of God to be who we are as He created us and as He wants us to be.

